Sometimes....

I dreamt once that I'd get to this
Amazing place where I'll find peace
A place I know it's meant for me
And say : "It's where i need to be"

So much adventure, so much fun
Feel as if,finally, life begun
So beautiful and so complex
A place where u don't know what's next

So I find myself here at last
But still I'm thinking of the past
So all I want now's to go home
'Cause there I'll never be alone...

Another shot ...

Despite the things you do
Whichever path you choose
If you don't fight it through
It's obvious you'll loose

So when you have a chance
Take it no matter who
Stands between her and you
As life is no slow dance

Yes, there's the chance you fail
Don't matter how you stand
But the truth will unveil
When that you'll understand

They'll try to put a ring
On her to keep her near
But if you she's missing
She'll someday see it clear

You'll only break me once...

-translation from romanian author-

She nests her soul into his chest
Knowing that silence would be best
Curiously, he asks her what she wants
"Nothing...you'll only break me once

I gave you all that's left of me
For good, for worse, for what should be
After I stitched my broken soul
When I thought I'll never be whole

And every stitch is tied with steel
But still, the same I'll never feel
So innocent, so happy, starry eyed
That part of me that loved the stars had died

Maybe you fear that I will never smile
Don't be afraid, I am not that fragile
But still, never forget this words:
My love, you'll only break me once"

From time to time , I find the time to stop and relax, while enjoying her amazing work. So I read her blog yesterday to find this amazing piece, reminding me how Carmen can leave me speechless. This is the original : "Mă poţi dezamăgi numai o dată"

Passion...

The dance floor is burning as we're face to face
Our bodies gone crazy as we sensed the bass
Girl, I felt your heat from the first embrace
The club's almost empty,still, we'd need more space

"Should we crash the car or go to your place?
Any second longer here would be a waste"
Soon,our bodies danced like never before
In a single heartbeat we were on the floor

Right now we were one, our heartbeats had matched
I knew she's the one the first time we touched
Our bodies were burning, melt under the sheets
The room looked like teared down by some crazy beasts

When the fire burned out, just like little kids
We're hiding together under the white sheets
It was crazy passion, but just for one night
We forgot each other at the first sun light

To Blaxy Girls...

A poem for five old friends that took part in an important chapter of my life. Actually, without them I wouldn't have lived that chapter, I wouldn't be who I am right now. Thanks, girls :)


Five girls inspired you
To act at your best
Those five girls made it true
That life's not a waste

With passion and talent
They make us believe
That energy well spent
Will help us achieve

What we've always wanted
What we'll ever need
You,little girls, started
This race in full speed

Armed with instruments
You rise to the stage
And then all become friends
No matter the age

'Cause music can make us
Live up to our dreams
Its passion can take us
To heaven, it seems

A new beginning....

A story of a new beginning, a new chapter in life, a poem that closes this chapter and the blog along with it. I'll be back soon with a new chapter.

Sometimes in life you think you've had enough

When everything goes wrong, when things start to get tough

You hope to find something to make you stay on top

To go ahead and do it, not let yourself be stoped

You feel that you are down, that there is no way out

You hope that all will end soon, your mind is full of doubt

Self confidence is nowhere, no reason to go on

And all your dreams have parished, while all your hope is gone

And still, you find someone that is looking out for you

Someone that cares, someone who will try to help you through

Right there, you start to wake up, believe you'll be ok

Because she's here to guide you, and here she's gonna stay

That's all you've ever needed, that's all you'll ever need

When to life you find meaning, you'll find out you can read

A ray of light in darkness, a shortcut through the woods

A way out of the maze in which you were lost for good

"Omule, dai si'nvata,te crezi atotstiutor?"

Is all that you have needed to get up from the floor

So now it's time to do it, now that you can achieve

Everything that you fought for, cause now you can believe

Once more, goodbye...

Some people think that love
Is all they need to feel
To help them rise above
And make it all seem real

I'm not saying they're wrong,
Misguided or naive
Cause if their faith is strong
It's helpful to believe

Still, I'm starting to think
That love's a fairy tale
And if you stop to blink
You'll fear that you may fail

In truth I think I would
Do better by myself
If I do as I should
I'll find that there's more wealth

In the words "love to live"
Than in them "live to love"
In freedom I believe
Not in the words above

Who am I lying to?
I've loved and will again
I might get to love you
Or her, or all of them

I'll just say that for now
I'm happy to be free
From you, from her... somehow
I'm where I need to be

So I guess it's goodbye
To all of you, my love
I'll spread my wings and fly
To the skies up above

So, once more, goodbye, love.

...Out of dreams

I had a dream a few nights ago about this beautiful little brunette with the most incredible blue eyes I have ever seen. She was singing a song to me. So, in the middle of the night, I woke up singing this song and started writing it down. So this is what she said:

You're the one for me
My boy can't you see
How you complete me?
Happiness, this is energy...
Out of dreams

All I wanna know
Is that you will be
Always close to me
Happiness, this is energy...
Out of dreams

My eyes only see
Your smile. You'll always be
The only one for me
Happiness, this is energy...
Out of dreams

All my life I knew
That I will find you
Our love is true
Happiness, this is energy...
Out of dreams


Am I in love again?

No pain, fun game...

There is just no life without love

Believe not what you've read above

Life can be fun without someone

That you would miss when she is gone

Cause when you have no one to fear

That you will loose when she's not near

You can live life without a doubt

And stand up tall to face the crowd

You can sin and never feel bad

You can hurt and never feel pain

Without love you will not feel sad

Don't be afraid to play the game

So,simple life: no one to blame...

Raining cigarettes...

The sky is crying silently

The red star stoped smiling at me

That warm sun that I prize so much

Is once again gone, out of touch

I am alone here with my sins

Aspiring for another life

One cigarette is all I strive

To find no matter by what means

The smoke is what keeps me alive

The thin silk thread dances the air

It tells a story that's so fair

It gives me reasons to survive

I think it's happening...

"To hell with emotions"'s what I used to say
Just have fun and enjoy life every single day
But what the hell happened? How did i get here?
Why do I feel lonely when she is not near?

I thought I figured out how to live my life
Away from the word "love", that cuts like a knife
I thought I can easily look at any girl
And see her as one of many in this world

But still this one girl I think got to me
To my heart somehow...My god... this can't be
With her little games, she's into my mind
And now I feel something...don't know of what kind

My narcissist self still remains untouched
But my universe now has shifted so much
The center of it all, that 'till now was me
Is sliding towards her. At least seems to be

I can't stand one night without being with her
She did get to me,man. Of that I am sure
I just feel complete with her in my arms
I know I have given in to all her charms

I won't say the words, for I am not sure
But still, to this illness, I know there's no cure
I am falling in it, but I won't give up
I will not surcome and fall in its trap

Love is not for me, not my way of life
As I like it, freedom is my only wife
Still, she makes me wonder just how could it be
If she was the one that was meant for me

But what's going on next? we shall live and see...


*This poem means a lot to me. One of my favorite actually. I think Carmen sensed this when she took my words and turned them round to write them in romanian. A real work of art that's touching the soul :): "Se intampla..."

Some stupid cast...

You look around you and you feel
Like running wildly through the field
Like jumping on the soft green grass
Like not letting a moment pass

You'd swim in crystal blue water
Along with the other mermaids
Such grace like you would have no other
Such beauty that all else just fades

You'd please the gods in graceful dance
You'd never look back in the past
You'd have achieved all of your plans
But what stops you's that stupid cast

Still, don't worry, this pain won't last

A dark cold world

As I opened my eyes today
I woke up in another world
As if it changed in some odd way
And everything just turned so cold

All that I had seemed to be lost
And all I hoped for turned to dust
And everything that I had cherished
In one second,one blink, had perished

Where was I now? God, what went wrong?
When yesterday I felt so strong
When days ago my world was hole
And now there's nothing in my soul

I fucked up but just don't know how
I did something but don't know what
It's me, I feel it in my gut
So what am I to do right now?

All that I loved has turned away
How the hell did it come to this?
I am now lost, I feel astray
So in the end... What did I miss?

Was she now?...

How can all these girls just have no remorse?
And cheat on their boyfriends with another one
And then cheat on that One with some other John
All the girls this days just have no remorse

Why do this to one that cares about her?
Just take what he gives her and play with his heart
And keep on doing that 'till he falls apart
She does this to one that cares about her

And how can you not give a fuck when he's down?
Pretend that you don't see what's in front of you
And never admit what should always be true
She just doesn't give a fuck when he's down

That's when he figures out that it is not worthed
And goes on with life like she was never there
So from that moment on he tries not to care
Thank god he figured out that it is not worthed

A light...

It's only fair to have some fun
When all you had to do is done
When all that you have loved is gone
And when all ends up being none

In vain you search for yesterday
When you no longer see a way
To get out of this mess some day
And melt the snow on which you lay

No wonder life is so fucked up
When you yourself have lost the map
And you can no longer rise up
To get out of this self set trap

But when your way seems to be lost
In life and love you have to trust
As one soul rises from the dust
And in her to believe you must

Her eyes are warm, her smile is light
Such an attraction you can't fight
And when, at dawn, you hold her tight
You know you will get through the night

Am I to be saved? I just might...

I do not give...

I didn't give you my heart
Just let you take it away
I've let you tear my soul apart
Hoping to stitch it back someday

And so you did with every word
You slowly came into my world
I had you breach my every thought
When how to love I just forgot

I didn't just show you my world
I let you see it through my eyes
So in the end, it's no surprise
That you're in my mind, sweet girl

So when you left I told myself
That I will never look for you
You're like a book, left on the shelf
Waiting for me to think of you

But that, my girl,'s not up to me
Will you come back? That we shall see
Will I still be here? No one knows
I guess that's just how this life goes

I'll see you again , I suppose...

Promises you can't keep...

I promised myself that all this will stop
I'll leave all behind and let it all drop
I promised a girl that we would then close
A story that faded along with a rose

I promised my heart that it shall hurt no more
That I'll lock my feelings behind a closed door
And I tend to keep this one single promise
Those sweet lips I'll never again try to kiss

But don't make a promise you know you can't keep
'Cause words will then haunt you when you fall asleep
You'll never forget that forbidden love
So don't believe any of the words above

Choices...

As darkness shelters the shadows of the night
It washes off the line between wrong and right
On a side of the lake, the girl stands alone
Reliving a past that should be her own

Memories, so lovely, but so painful yet
Of moments that have past, of people she had met
It's all just one big story, a story of a girl
That's trying to find out what's for her in this world

She finds that she has got to a crossroads yet again
Not knowing where to head for, not knowing why or when
She has to make a choice that will influence her life
And goes ahead so reckless, without thinking it twice

There is always a choice, girl, and you have just made yours
Don't think that you will ever, find here some open doors
Keep thinking with your head then, and cry a broken heart
'Cause in the end what matters is we all fall apart

* Probably the ugliest poem I have ever written... imperfect rhymes... no measure... no rhythm. Words and emotions spilled out with no regard for anything... one of the best expressions of anger... I'm sorry...

Another end...

"I'm sorry, boy" is all she said
Another story comes to'an end
Another chapter closes now
And what hurts more's not "Why?", but "How?"

It seemed like yesterday was fine
Her heart would beat the same with mine
But now she says goodbye to me
I guess it wasn't meant to be

The whole deal was just too fucked up
To ever end good anyway
From the start we knew we'd messed up
But we just went on either way

And now the pain should bleed my heart
And sweetly tear my soul apart
But time should heal it in some way
So I could start another day

Another song plays its last note
Another wave to sink the boat
Another star falls from the sky
Another rose would fade and die

But she's not any other girl...

Silence...

Again and again, you try to find out
What is in her head, what's it all about
It pisses you off knowing that she hurts
And you are not there to tell her the words

She won't talk to you, won't answer your call
And then when you ask her "It's nothing at all :)"
'Cause nothing hurts more than knowing you can't
Go knock on her door and say what you meant

She's not gonna tell you what's bothering her
But it's not OK, of that you are sure
So you just keep trying 'till she kisses you
And says "I'm fine, baby", to hell that ain't true

"A girl's heart's an ocean of empty emotions"
But you've heard this selfish excuse to exhaustion
Girl, you may be hurting, but it hurts me too
The' unbearable silence between me and you

So talk to me baby, I'm waiting for you...

I don't miss you at all...

As I wake up to face the day
A part of me is still away
Inside a dream, with you, sweet girl
...
But still, I don't miss you at all


Each second seems to never end
In every moment that I spend
So far away from you, sweet girl
...
But still, I don't miss you at all


Each pair of souls that I pass by
Remind me of the one I try
To keep out of my mind, sweet girl
...
But still, I don't miss you at all


But in the end, the only lie
I can come up with in the try
To not think of you, little girl
...
Is this: "I don't miss you at all"


Truth is...I miss you more than life...